Nhamo in paradise

8 months old

I know I start every monthly update with the same comment, but here it goes - Gabriel, you've grown so much!!  My brain is fried from moving, so I'm simply going to brainstorm a bulleted list here:

•  Still constantly pulling yourself up to a stand, only now you don't need much support to do so.  Even something a few inches off the ground gives you enough of a boost.  And, lately, you been standing for a few seconds all by yourself.  The first time was at B&N, when you let go of the table to transfer a train from one hand to the other.  You also prefer to stand when you eat...making it a much messier process.

• Food! Lately, you've even pushed your mama away in favor of solid food.  :-(  You LOVE to eat.  So far, you've eaten:  avocado, scrambled eggs, chicken, beef, beans, rice, broccoli, sweet potatoes, hummus, french fries, potatoes, all kinds of fruits (your favorites seems to be grapes, peaches and mangos), and yogurt, You consistently eat breakfast and dinner, and snack on whatever we are eating throughout the day.
• Your favorite snack is the O cereal (toasted oats in the bulk section, but we still call them 'cheeri-os')  As a matter of fact, for a while the word 'cheeri-os' was a favorite around here; he would fall into hysterical fits of laughter when we said it.
• You want to feed yourself, and are working on the pincher grip.  If we give you one O cereal at a time, you will carefully put your thumb and forefinger around it in a perfect pincer grip.  Any more than one, though, and you simply paw them up and try to shove as many as you can into your mouth!  I'm also impressed with your aim using a spoon - your miss percentage is about 50 percent - not bad! 
• Your favorite play activity is to crawl around seeing what you haven't discovered yet.  You've found exiting things so far - plastic bags, sharp objects, pebbles, bugs, electric wires, and cats with claws. You next favorite activity is turning all your toys upside down or pushing them 'back and forth' to see what they do.  Finally, you are starting to play 'hide and seek'...we'll hide behind something and say 'come find me,' and you'll squeal with delight as you make a beeline towards where you last saw us. 
  
• Your language over all hasn't increased since last month, but you are using your voice more purposefully now.  You've also signed 'all done' a couple of times now.
• Your personality is blossoming, and it's so much fun to get to know you!  You are such an easy-going kiddo, and love to laugh.  You also do a good job of calming yourself down when you get upset.  And if you can't, it usually just takes a little baba/mama love to help.  As long as your not overtired, we can just look into your eyes and talk or sing softly and you'll calm right down.  It's so very sweet to see you take a little breath, relax, and sometimes even break out into a smile.  ('The ants go marching' song is a surefire winner in this regard.)
• You love music!  You will stare longingly at the stereo until we turn it on.  A few weeks ago at graduation, you went into total bliss when the live band started to play - smiling and dancing and flipping out with joy.  Baba recently showed you how to play the drums at home. 
• Sleep is getting much much better.  You actually prefer to sleep in your co-sleeper instead of in the bed with mama and baba.  You still prefer to wake up every two hour and be fed, but then you want mama to put you back in your own space.  I think you like to stretch out!

All's quiet on the blog front...

because we're in moving chaos over here.  We only have two more days to completely move out of the apartment.  I'll post pics of the new house as soon as the dust settles.

shhhh....

As I type this, Gabriel is sleeping in a crib for the very first time.  Ten minutes in - and he's still asleep!  I am sitting right outside the crib so that he will see me when he wakes up.  I want him to associate the crib with sleep and safety, just like his co-sleeper.  Here's the official plan in the sleep department.  We currently have two sleep goals:  1) To get him to sleep in his crib for naps and the first part of the evening (mama and baba would like some private time) and  2) To get him to sleep straight through at least 7 hours without nursing.  Our strategy for the first goals started today.  I went and bought blinds that 'blackout' the room where his crib his and made sure his blanket and stuffed tiger were in his crib for him.  I then nursed him down to drowsy and laid him down.  So far, so good.  I figure we'll do naptimes in here for a week, and then move to evenings as well.  I don't want to start evenings until he feels secure enough in the crib so we can leave the room (trapped in baby's room for an hour nap we can handle, trapped in here from 7:00 - 11:00, not so much.)

The second goal is going to be a little harder.  We'll bring him into bed with us when we go to sleep (around 10:30/11:00pm) and I'll nurse him one last time.  Then we're going to follow Dr.Gordon's suggestions.  I'm not sure when we will be starting this one.  I knew I wouldn't start this sooner than 6 months.  Dr. Gordon and others really don't believe in starting this until after 12 months.  We're trying to follow Gabe's signals as to when he's ready for this, and well as our own health and sanity regarding sleep. Lately, instead of waking up every 3-4 hours to be fed at night, he has been waking up every hour (or less!) just wanting a 'snack.'  So I've been doing a modified of Dr. Gordon's suggestions anyway, just at random times.  I'm thinking if we're putting him through the crying anyway, we might as well do the whole program and get everyone some sleep soon.

Update: He slept for almost 2 hours!!!  I can't believe it.  If I would of known he was going to take *that* long of a nap I would of planned to do more work this morning! All went well when he work up.  He opened his eyes and scanned the room, looking a little concerned until he saw my face - and then lit up with that beautiful grin of his. Boy, do I love this kid. I took the above pic right after he woke up.  And before I forget - a call out 'thanks' to Sonja, who loaned us the crib.  I love the elegant, simple design - but even better, I love the 'life' and love that come with it.  I think Gabe's the 5th or 6th baby to dream sweet dreams within it's protective frame.  Thanks Sonja!

Happy Birthday, Baba!

Baba's birthday celebration started last night with dinner at JoJo's house (means 'uncle' in Chinese) and homemade pumpkin cheesecake.  Today Gabriel and I surprised her with more tasty treats (and no, not more cake, but wild salmon, fancy olives, delicious cheeses and figs.)  For Ty, this is much better than another cake!  Happy birthday, love. 

Let the games begin...

 I thought babbling would come slowly, with Gabriel gradually putting more and more syllables together.  Instead, we have a flood.  Thursday afternoon we went on a walk by the river, and halfway through Gabriel started 'talking' - and didn't stop!  He's been babbling nonstop ever since.  His favorite comment so far is 'bababababa', with other consonant-vowel sounds thrown in for good measure.  The best part is the inflection in his voice when he is taking to us - it feels like we are having a real conversation with him. 

On this same walk, our stroller was given a new name - the 'evil baby catcher.'  Gabriel did *not* want to be in his stroller on the walk and instead wanted to be held.  Most of his time 'around town' is in slings and wraps, so he is not used to being in the stroller. I love to carry him, so it usally not an issue, but sometimes it's nice to *not* carry him.  Nope, not having any of it.  So he spent a good part of the walk in Baba's arms, looking accusingly at the stroller.

In addition to babbling, Gabriel has made great strides in the standing department.  No matter how much we encourage him to crawl, the boy wants to STAND.  The above pic. is him standing with the assistance of his favorite purple seat.

It's Official!

 
Ty's adoption paperwork came through!  Gabriel is now 'officially' Ty's son. (that is, 'official' in the eyes of the federal government - Gabriel has always known he was her son.)  The new birth certificate should come in 6 - 8 weeks. 

Reflections on "Days..."

Last Mothers day when I was pregnant with our son, Ty gave me beautiful flowers and spoiled me like crazy.  We celebrated 'baba's day' on fathers day that year, and I spoiled her right back (albeit without the flowers.)  We had no idea, back then, the flood of emotions and new identities our son would inspire.  We had no idea, back then, of the immense pressure society would place upon our little family to fit within a binary system.  A few days before Mothers Day Ty said to me "let's both celebrate mothers day *and* fathers day."  I was surprised at my own reaction to this - I felt upset.  And not in the way most people would expect.  I had conflicting emotions and actually felt joy at celebrating mothers day together, my feelings to this aspect were 'of course!"  No, I felt upset at the idea of sharing fathers day.  I mulled this reaction over for a while, trying to figure out why I felt this way, and eventually boiled it down to this:  to me, celebrating fathers day did not fit with my own identity as a mother. I remember telling Ty: "but I don't 'feel' like a father. Although it doesn't happen often, in this case, I actually identified with only one end of the spectrum.  Ty, however, was having the opposite reaction.  Instead of feeling like a lesbian 'dad,' she was identifying with both motherhood and fatherhood - and finding herself pushed to choose one over the other in order to 'pick' the day in which to celebrate her parenthood.  She didn't want to pick.  So - we both celebrated mothers day this year - and spoiled each other crazy.  And, as you can see in the previous post, we also celebrated 'Baba's day' yesterday - a day all into itself, complete with unique blending of masculine and feminine parenting that Ty gifts to Gabriel.  As for fathers day, who knows.  We're still figuring all of this out. Watching Ty proudly wear her 'World's Greatest Dad' t-shirt, I see another party and a powerdrill on the horizon.

PS - Happy Blogging for LGBT Family Day everyone!

Happy Baba's Day!

An important dilemma around this house recently - when to celebrate baba's day - was recently solved by Aunt Laura.  She reminded us that June 1st was directly between mothers day and fathers day - making it the perfect choice for Baba's day!  We celebrated by bringing her coffee in bed and giving her lots of gifts.  Gabriel made her a card (with his handprint and everything) and gave her this book.  I spent the last month putting together a photo album of special times between Gabriel and his baba. Although I offered to take Ty out to dinner anyplace she wanted - she opted to stay home and make spring rolls.  Mmmm....I'm glad she did.  That was *my* favorite Baba's day treat!   All in all, I think the day was a hit. 

No sleep = grumpy

And I'm talking about me here, not the wee bear.  Gabriel had slept horrible last night, which makes no sense because the day before he had two great naps with the last nap ending about 4 hours before bedtime.  He ate well and his teeth didn't seem to be bothering him.  This should result in a great night of sleeping, yes?  No. For starts, he wouldn't go down to sleep at his 7:00 bedtime...took over an hour.  After waking for his usual 11:00 time to nurse, he then woke up at 1:30am WIDE AWAKE.  The kid was not crying like his teeth hurt, he simply didn't want to sleep.  It was like he wanted to just  'hang out.' Making things worse, he was just learned how to climb out of the co-sleeper and onto the bed.  (Yes, we have a crib on the way.)  After an hour of trying to get him back to sleep in the co-sleeper, baba took over.  He eventually fell asleep on her shoulder, but slept fitfully.  I think we finally put him back in his co-sleeper around 4:00.  He then woke up for the morning at 6:30. 

Luckily, around 7:30 I got a short reprieve, as baba fed him breakfast and I went back and crashed for a while.  Unfortunately, baba also had a paper to write this morning, so couldn't take him longer than 8:00am.  So I ate breakfast and played with him drowsily thinking "okay, just hang in there until naptime."  This week he's been sleeping 45-90 minutes consistently for his morning nap. Today, after he went down for a nap, I crashed into bed.  20 minutes later, just as I drift into sleep, guess who wakes up??  30 minutes of singing to a fussy baby later, I curl into bed only to be wakened again in - 20 minutes.

I was so done with him.  I always love him - but this morning I sure didn't *like* him.  Luckily, I was able to shake off my bad feelings n the shower and be the happy mama the rest of the day.  He helped by being super extra cute and smiling today.  As for me, I'm going to bed early tonight!

On a side note, the koala bear sleeps up to 22 hours a day.  I'm thinking about a trade in for a day. 

Happy Anniversary

To my partner, my friend, my love - happy anniversary. We'll go out to dinner tomorrow, and it will be wonderful to spend time alone together at a nice restaurant - I love dressing up and going out to romantic dinners.  I want you to know, however, that my favorite times - the times I hold most precious - are not the 'official' romantic occasions, but the unpredictable moments when the world fades for a second and we 'see' each other, connecting souls through life's craziness.  I'm so glad we found each other - and that it's you who is walking beside me on this life's journey.  Here's to one of the multiple unpredictable moments in the journey. 

"Baba"

Yesterday Ty was making breakfast while Gabriel bounced in his 'jump-up' thing (a bouncer you hang it from a door frame.)  She said he looked right at her and said "baba."  Go Gabe!  He is so in love with his baba.  :-)
 

W Look-alike Meter

I saw this on another blog and thought I'd try it out.  I'm not sure how accurate it is, but it was fun!

7 months!

The wee bear is 7 months old today.  The theme of this past month has been 'Get Moving!' Little boy is serious about this moving business.  He is now cross-crawling everywhere and  this past week has developed a new pasttime - pulling himself to a stand.  He uses any opportunity to do this - hence this morning's picture.  Poor baba just wanted to lay on the floor and play with her little boy.  He reached out his arms to her - 'how sweet - yes? - perhaps to give her a hug, to play?  NOPE!  He reached out to grab her hair and pull himself to a stand.  LOL.



His other focus this week has been climbing the floor pillow.  Every morning he crawls past all of his toys and heads for the pillow.  He tries and tries to crawl over this thing.  He gets so frustrated - but gets even more upset when I try to help!  Here's a pic of his climbing efforts.

Other  things  Gabriel has been up to:
 - Picking up blocks and hitting them together.  (also, hitting mom's hands with blocks as she tries to to change his diaper.)

- Feeding himself 'banana pops' and trying to pick up cheerios.  For the latter, he can pick them up in a 'raking' style, but can't figure out how to get them in his mouth.

- Trying out new sounds!  He started with mmmmm this month, and then quickly switched over to bbbbb. (I'll post more about this later)  The last picture is him making the 'mmm' sound.

- Playing peek-a-boo, better known as 'where's mommy?'  I'll put a blanket over my head and say 'where's mommy?'  He'll pull off the blanket and grin in delight.

(LOL - I just asked Ty 'what new big things has Gabe been doing' and she said "it's all big to me!")  Gabriel had a definate 'ah hah' moment yesterday.  He pushed his caterpiller toy, watched it move forward.  He then reached out, pulled it back to himself and pushed it again.  He paused for a minute and you could just see the gears turning.  He got this wonderful look of comprehension on his face and then spent the whole morning push/pulling this toy. And then today I recognized that he is purposely opening and closing the lids on his 'pop-up' toy. 

Too scared to sleep?

I think our little guy is starting some separation anxiety.  The last few nights he has has a really hard time putting himself back to sleep.  Usually he will sleep from 7:00 to 10:30, nurse, and then sleep until 2-3:00. I know he stirs in between this time, but he is good at putting himself back to sleep. The last few nights he's been waking up every 45 minutes and screaming for us instantly when he wakes (instead of putting himself back to sleep.)  It's a cry I haven't heard before.  Ty and I have been taking turns going in there and patting/cooing/singing him back to sleep.  I think it's separation anxiety because he settles down within minutes of our presence.  Any one have this issue at 7 months?

Visit from Uncle Matt

Yeah!  My brother Matt visited from California (LA).   I hadn't seen him in over 5 years.  On the one hand, I think 'Damn, that's a long time.'  And then he gets here and it's like we've never been apart.  He hasn't changed, I haven't changed - still brother /sister relationship type of stuff going on.  It's almost like 'comfort food'.  :-)  He's a great guy and I'm so very glad to call him my brother.  He even increased his coolness factor in my eyes by being able to quote eddie izzard skits with me.  :-)  It was wonderful to see him interact with Gabriel.  Here are some pics from our picnic in the park.  The second one is Matt teaching Gabriel that the secret to looking like you're the guy in charge is to point assertively (apparently this works in the movie industry.  I'll have to try it out in our departmental meetings and see how it goes.)  I also found out that his partner Katie reads this blog more than he does.  "She updates me' he says.  LOL.  Hey Kate - glad you're here and thanks for keeping the brother informed.
 

My hero...

Our usually evening routine goes like this.  Around 6:45 Ty gives Gabriel his bath.  She then hands him off to me and starts cooking dinner.  I take Gabriel into the bedroom, read him his bedtime story and sing/nurse him to a drowzy state.  Then I lay him in his co-sleeper and pat his back until he falls asleep.  The latter part usually takes a while (15 - 30 minutes), but usually it's a nice downtime for me because I browse the internet and catch up on blogs, etc.  Tonight, however, was a disaster.  Our little guy did NOT want to sleep, and kept crying and crying.  I tried rubbing his back, whispering to him, singing to him, holding him in the bed, nursing him...nothing was working.  By now, Ty had come in to help.  She leaned over him and he was surprised enough to see her face directly over him that he stopped crying for a moment.  She then started singing 'their song'...a beautiful lullaby composed by our rabbi.  It was the first song he ever heard, minutes after he came into this world.  Tonight, his eyes fixed on hers as she sang, and his breathing slowed.  Slowly, softly, he fell asleep.  My hero!  And his as well.  :-)

We have a tooth!

a 'fang' actually.  He bit down on my finger today and I felt small sharp pointy thing dig into my skin.  I though teeth were smooth on top?!  I'm bracing myself for the moment he bites down when nursing.  I shouldn't damper his newest accomplishment, though - so CONGRATS little wee bear!

Stealing hearts already...

I love this picture.

Small update...

As always, things are crazy around here.  I also just haven't felt like writing. I usually blog in the evening, after Gabriel has gone to sleep and Ty and I have eaten dinner (around 8:00.)  It seems that this past week I've gotten less 'me' time...or it could be that I'm just craving more 'me' time than normal, but either way, I don't want to blog.  Or, I do want to blog, but I just don't want to take up the little time I have to myself to do it.  So - quick updates.  The boy is now crawling everywhere.  He still uses one knee and one foot, so you think that would slow him down.  Nope!  On top of this, he has decided that crawling on the floor is not challenging enough.  Everytime I put him down in the living room he makes a bee line or the floor pillows..  Than he gets frustrated when he can't climb all the way up them.  He is also starting to get a little of that stranger anxiety.  He's been such a social kid up until now that it's easy to see when it clicks in.  He's still smiling at folks 80% of the time...but I can see this is going to change soon.  I also need to blog about sleep soon...just when I thought we had his schedule down, and he was sleeping well, he decided to change. 

Crawling?!?

Not  yet - but if the boy has anything to say about it, very very soon!  Right now, he will get onto his hands and knees (a position he can get to with ease now a days) and then pause for a moment as if he's thinking.  Then he'll pick up his right hand and place it down an inch or so in front of him (so far so good.)  His next move, however, is always the same - he picks his right knee of the ground and plants his food down instead.  So now he's stuck.  He's figures out that he can still do his little bunny hop from this position, so he can get to a toy that's out of reach, but you can tell he 'knows' there's a way to move much faster, if only he can figure it out!

I think this weekend Ty and I are going to have to baby-proof the house.